This isn't goodbye, it's hello

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So if you came around recently, you probably noticed a few changes underway!

I really never thought the day would come, but I've decided to retire Musings and other Ramblings of a crazy / beautiful mind. I remember telling a friend it was my baby and I could never let it go! 

If you were already a reader, you probably know that I started this blog at a very dark time in my life.  I'm not going to talk about my mental health any further except to say that this blog served it's purpose at the time, and I'm so glad I decided to start it, because it was the first step towards my recovery and following my dreams.  If you really want to know all about it, go back and read a bit.  Use anxiety, depression or bipolar disorder as keywords to search the blog, you'll find all you're looking for. I didn't just write on those subjects though, so feel free to peruse the archives :)

Skip ahead three years, and here I am, a brand new me. 

I don't look at the floor and say "I'm kind of like an artist" anymore. I don't see myself as a walking diagnosis anymore. In fact, I rarely think about those things at all anymore. I feel good, strong, confident. 

I feel better than I have my whole life, and can actually say I'm generally happy... Which may seem like a normal thing to some, but never seemed possible for me. 

My perspective on life has changed a lot, and meds have helped stop the anxiety.  

Stopped. Me. No anxiety. Wow. 

Which brings me to why I've decided to retire Musings. I feel like I have nothing left to say on the subject.  I would like to revisit at some point, as there is always something new me wants to tell old me when I read my old posts. 

This journey that started with a single blog post has brought me on wonderful adventures that have led me to where I am today, so this is where I want to take my baby too, I do hope you'll join me. 

In the past year, I started three of my own businesses. I officially opened "La fée Licia", my own face painting company which has been doing really decently this summer. I don't know how good the winter's going to be, but here's hoping for lots of fairy princess parties. (It's really awesome, I get to wear an amazingly pretty dress and a tiara, the little girl in me is thrilled - I always said you could only get away with wearing a tiara on your wedding a day...  Ha! I feel so smart sometimes! Hahaha

 I also started up "The Time Fairy" or "La fée du temps", a personal shopping and assistance service. It's been pretty slow going, but I need to do some serious advertising.  Now that the kids are back in school, I have my days free to go out and find me some clients! 

And then there's Felicianation. Oooh I'm so excited about everything I'm doing! have found my confidence as an artist in polymer clay, and I'm so glad I picked it up.  I had opened an etsy shop sometime last year, but I never put any real work in it and as is the usually the case when you put no work into something, it went nowhere. 

Then I joined a group for etsy sellers from Quebec on Facebook a couple of months ago and things slowly started to make more sense. I leaned a lot from reading their posts, questions from newbies and answers from well established shop owners. I started to get excited again, to believe that it could work. So I retook all my pics, worked on my texts, and re-launched. I reached five sales last week! In about six weeks, compared to a year before that - I think that's fantastic.  It's only just begun...

I decided on Felicianation Ink as the blog's new name. Felicianation is a word I invented way back then. It was symbolic for my taking control over my own life, rebelling against the oppression. "This is my world I live by my rules" kind of thing. I also loved that it sounded like a mix of the words fascination and imagination, thus the title phrase "welcome to felicianation, where imagination meets fascination to create a new dimension."

The phrase never seemed to catch on (hey, I still like it!) but the word stuck, and when it came time to naming my polymer clay jewellery and accessory company, Felicianation was a no-brainer. 

It's since been tweaked to Felicianation Creations for my polymer clay items, and just freshly launched a couple of weeks ago, Felicianation Prints, where you can purchase prints of my digital creations, originals and paintings, though I only have digitals up right now. There are many more listings to come for both shops, it can actually be quite daunting!

So as I gear up for the Christmas season and three crafts fairs, I've also decided to start writing again!  I miss updating you all on my progress, and the interaction we had when I was more consistent around here!  I've decided to introduce a weekly post that will most likely be published on Wednesdays starting very soon. It will be called "Made in Quebec : Spotlight on (insert artisan name here)"

There is so much talent here in Quebec, and I am so grateful to my little group for their invaluable help. I want to give back to them and the artisan community, which has welcomed me with open arms and always made me feel right at home. I'll tell you about their products of course, but more than that, I want to introduce you to the artist, a little about themselves and their process.

So I'm thinking Mondays will be about me; personal updates, new creations, up-coming events.. Whatever's on my mind. Wednesdays for Made in Quebec and Fridays will be random. I want to touch on a variety of subjects that may interest artisans and buyers alike.

More to come soon, I've got so many projects on the go, it's hard to keep up sometimes!

Here are a few more pics of prints available at http://www.etsy.com/shop/felicianationprints and newly created, not yet listed items for http://www.etsy.ca/shop/felicianation 

Blogging Changed My Life

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I just realized that it was my blog's third anniversary on Monday!

197 posts. 199,247 page views, as of today. This will be 198. 

So much has changed since I wrote that first post. I've changed so much. 

When I first started writing, I was in a very bad place, and I felt very misunderstood. I needed to express myself, and blogging was a way to set the record straight, and made me feel like I'd gotten closure in certain situations and gained control in others. There was an outpouring of love and support from the online community, and I have made some lasting relationships. One of the best parts is that sometimes, I helped someone. Comments about thanking me for sharing, my story helping, them feeling less alone. You'd think that was the best part, but it's not.

The best thing this blog has done for me is to allow me to heal. By revealing my deep-down secret to the world, I finally took away my shame, and slowly began to see myself as a person instead of a mental health disorder. From the day I was diagnosed to the day I started this blog, I had stopped being me. For close to 9 years, I walked around feeling like nothing more than a label. Damaged goods. 

I have gone from being on disability with my most severe depressive episode ever to starting my own three businesses. I still dream of big things, but I've learned to accept myself, and appreciate all that I already have. 

Over the past couple of years, I have started to feel this quiet contentment, like I have a good life and I'm on a good path. I'm not really sure what the future holds, but I don't really worry about it anymore either. I've adopted a very "que sera sera attitude" towards life: I'll give it my all and the pieces will fall as they will!

I want to thank my readers for your support. Your comments and our interactions on social media have helped me grow, returned my self confidence and sense of self worth and helped me discover, accept and even... Love myself. Thank you just doesn't cover it. 

There will be some new developments around here soon, so stay tuned for some news :)

I don't have a clever title for this post

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Hello again, dear readers. If you still come by to read that is. I know I haven't been a consistent blogger in a long while, so I understand if you got tired of visiting only to see the same old post.

I think about you guys all the time, but all my "I should write a post about that" ideas drift off, and I get caught up on other things. 

I'm working on a big project right now, a new company that could provide nicely for me and my family. I meet with my potential financiers tomorrow. I'm a bit nervous, but my contact seems to think there's no reason to worry, so I'm hopeful. 

Other important issues were fixed for us late last week, so I'm feeling lighter, as the stress was getting to me.  I kept trying to remind myself that everything always seems to work itself and that my angels or the universe have my back, but still!

Anyway, I can't wait to tell you all about my new company... I think it's going to be awesome ;)

Thanks for reading xxx

PS: I threw in a pic of a digital drawing I did this week just because, well why not?

Polymer Clay Jewelry by Felicianation

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Only two days (I guess it's really one day by this time of night) to go until the big art fair, so I wanted to share some of my exciting new creations with you. Well, I think they're exciting anyway, so I hope you do to!

Tired of that ugly chain your ID pass hangs off of at work?  Why not replace it with a statement necklace that adds some punch to your outfit?

A little steam punk inspiration...

All of my remaining items will be available on Etsy following the fair on Saturday, but feel free to drop me a line anytime if you'd like to order a custom piece!

Drop by facebook and like my page at http://www.facebook.com/feliciamaystevenson